i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
