Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize