i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize