Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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