Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
