Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
