Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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