You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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