there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
