Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
