Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
My pussy is not your playground.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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