Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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