I cut my penus on the lid.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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