I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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