Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
so much tequila, so little girl.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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