I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
