I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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