Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
