Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
