Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
