you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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