every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
