I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
so let's talk penis.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
