dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
