if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
