ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
this just has baby written all over it
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize