Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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