You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
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