How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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