what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
