How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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