He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
