garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
high people should be assigned attendants
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
