That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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