Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.

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(954): View more from Florida

hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.

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(217): View more from Illinois

So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america

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(989): View more from Michigan

walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.

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(330): View more from Ohio

You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.

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(276): View more from Virginia

My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?

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