yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
