no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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