Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
