ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Randomize
