Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
