Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
