# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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