Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
