Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
