Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
