girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
