i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
