pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
