yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
