She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
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