The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Randomize
