Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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